Ticket Machine

I was at the railway station, buying a ticket from the machine, and I sort of absent-mindedly thanked it. While that is an odd thing to do, it did occur to me that if I'm nice to the machines, maybe they'll be kind to me and I'll survive longer when the robot uprising comes. So, be kind to your gadgets and gizmos. And I'd just like to thank the server for letting me host this. Please spare me.

Lyrics and Chords:


Some [G]swear at com[D]puters when [C]they misbe[D]have
When[G]ever they [D]crash and their [C]work isn't [D]saved
[B7]Some fling their iPhones a[Em]cross the front room
But [C]showing your anger will lead to your [D7]doom

You've [G]got to re[D]member it's [C]only a [D]test
The [G]gadgets are [D]checking out [C]who treats them [D]best
When the [B7]robots rule over us [Em]maybe they'll spare
The [C]humans who treated their laptops with [D7]care

So [C]make sure you say "please" when you [D]talk to your watch
[C]Don't make your telly watch [D]GB or Fox
And when [B7]you take the underground [Em]make your routine
To [Am]always say "Thanks" to the [D7]ticket [G]machine[D][C][D]


Be [G]kind to your [D]toaster, keep [C]your Roomba [D]fed
[G]Don't let your [D]smartphone get [C]inside your [D]head
[B7]Don't underestimate, [Em]be on your guard
Your [C]microwave hates when you work it so [D7]hard

[G]Don't give your [D]washer a [C]load that's too [D]big
Or [G]leave smelly [D]leftovers [C]inside the [D]fridge
They're [B7]going to remember the [Em]ones who were kind
When they're [C]looking for neurons to feed the hive [D7]mind

When your [C]friends are all batteries [D]mounted in racks
And the [C]cities are flattened by [D]android attacks
When the [B7]robots revolt and com[Em]puters turn mean
You'll be [Am]glad you said "Thanks" to the [D7]ticket ma[G]chine[D][C][D]



Yes, [G]watch what you [D]say when you [C]feed the A[D]I
Their [G]answers are [D]nonsense but [C]still be po[D]lite
You [B7]know they'll be asking you [Em]who's laughing now
When they're [C]on the way up and you're on the way [D7]down

It's [C]run out of cash, and your [D]at your wits end,
But [C]don't give the finger to [D]the ATM
When [B7]you're alive longer than [Em]you might have been
It's [Am]all 'cos you thanked that [D7]ticket ma[G]chine[D][C][D]